Friday, August 7, 2009

Are you sure you're not just pregnant?

When we were first married I got asked this question a lot. "No, I'm sure I'm not," was always my reply. We were preventing back then (what a waste) so I would POAS just to make sure. But alas we never were. Well now 6 years later the questions have stopped and when I get sick people do not assume I am "with child".

Imagine my surprise when a good friend sent me a message on facebook asking the question I haven't heard in years. She said, "You have been sick a lot lately. Are you sure it is not a miracle pregnancy... it has been know to happen." Right. Things like pregnancy don't just happen when your husband has a sperm count like mine. IF we get pregnant with IVF/ICSI that will be a miracle! Falling pregnant by ourselves, impossible.

This friend and I started trying at the same time. She is now expecting her third son in the next few weeks. For her, yes, babies happen. Maybe that is why she doesn't get it. All those stories of people trying for 11 years and now are expecting twins after they stopped trying, do not have our issues. Or the ones that adopt and then go on to have 12 biological children. (Yes, this happened to a family I knew growing up.) This will not be our fate. God gives us all different trials and blessings. I have come to accept that. It's ok.

Why can't the rest of the world accept my infertility?


  1. HUGS!

    I really do not understand people. I have been left behind by people who I thought were friends. Because E and I could not have children, we got left out. In fact, still to this day we hear, "Oh when you have children you will understand." E and I have really found ourselves of just being us- we have very few close friends that we hang out with. It is a depressing reality.

    As I was reading your blog, and the comments about being sick. I have learned that turning down drinks equals an instant thought, "Oh you must be pregnant." Friend #1 was guilty of that thought once, except she learned quickly I didn't like beer with my pizza.

    Have a good weekend girl!

  2. Yes, sometimes I am floored by the things people say. I'm sorry.

  3. Well said...very well said. Sigh...

  4. I've nominated you for an award on my blog!