FET underway

I am slowly getting back into the swing of things. I returned to work yesterday and have enjoyed not sitting in the house all day. It started to get really depressing. I had my appt with my RE, I guess you could call it a WTF, but I already knew what went wrong. I started bcp on the 17th and Lupron will start up again on Sunday the 28th. Ask me if I am optimistic about this cycle...

Not really...

I know women get pregnant from FET, but all the statistics show that a fresh transfer is so much better. I just feel jipped that we didn't even get to try it. I know we still have plenty of embryos... I know our chances may be better than most... it still doesn't take away the doubt. There was no way in my condition we could've done a fresh transfer, but it still really sucks!

Success stories about FET needed, please.

OHSS will be the death of me!

Seriously, this is not fun. On Sunday and Monday I was in so much pain. I cried for hours. Luckily yesterday and today have been so much better. I went for a "check-up" with the RE yesterday which meant I got an u/s and then the IVF coordinator, glorified medical assistant, came in and told me to keep up my fluids and took my waist measurement. (Which by the way is up 7 inches since retrieval last Thursday) I was like, I thought I was going to see the NP. Nope apparently not. She looked over the u/s and sent me home with more pain and nausea meds. Fabulous.


At least I can eat now. I haven't really eaten in days because my stomach gets full super fast and then it kills. Plus the nausea which made it next to impossible to eat anything. Most of that discomfort has gone away. Now it is just breathing and sleeping that are the main pains. My lady parts are floating in a sea of fluid. Did I mention I look 5 months pregnant? I didn't realize I looked that bad until yesterday in the lab they had me pee in a cup. In the last week I haven't really worn anything other then baggy sweats and sweatshirt. Today to go out in public I was wearing yoga pants and a normal top. I took one look and just started in amazement. Here is a little pic...




Yep, that's all fluid. No wonder I feel so gross. I have also developed several large cysts on each ovary. That, the RN who does the u/s, is why I feel so awful. She said if it was just one or the other it wouldn't be so bad.


So sorry I haven't been around much to comment. I promise to be back in full force soon! Miss and love you ladies!!

Transfer canceled

I am devastated. I have felt pretty awful, so I know it is the best decision, but that doesn't take away the sadness. I talked to my RE this morning, all the embryos that have yet to be frozen still look great and will be frozen today. He said given the number of embryos we have he really thinks we will have a successful FET. He was still somewhat willing to do the transfer, but really felt like it was not a good idea. When I told him I was feeling like we should postpone he said he agreed. He did call me in a pain medication, anti-nausea, and some kind of suppository to help with the symptoms.

I know 17 is a great number but I wanted 2 in me today. This journey has been nothing like what I thought it would be. I never imagined I would get OHSS and that is would reek havoc on my body. I didn't want to complicate things and make them worse by getting pregnant. That wouldn't be good for me or the baby. I know I made the right decision, it is just hard.

Fert report

We have 17 embryos!! The clinic is going to freeze half today as they wont be affected by the freeze thaw process at this stage. I still don't know if we will do the transfer due to the OHSS, which by the way is the worst thing ever! I now look like I am 5 months pregnant due to the fluid in my abdomen. Luckily I haven't been throwing up or put on any weight. (Well I guess that's not entirely true. Yesterday I was down 5 lbs when I got to the hospital and now I am back up to where I was all along.) I was in so much pain last night I told DH I don't want to be pregnant. I just want to feel better. I am so glad the morning brings clarity and peace. I am feeling better today and hope it continues to get better from here on out.

21!

They retrieved 21 mature eggs today. Not as many as I thought given my E2 levels. I am extremely pleased though. I am feeling pretty achy but good overall. I feel like pockets of air and gas are caught in parts of my body like my shoulder and chest. As I get up and move around they seem to get better. My mom and DH were both there which made me feel relaxed about the whole process. I am just grateful it all happened and wasn't canceled because of my E2 levels.

If this post seems a little all over sorry. I am still under the influence. Sorry I haven't commented much lately. OHSS has really kept me in bed most of the time. Hopefully I will be back up and running in the next few days and after transfer.

OHSS

Yep, I have it. I was so giddy when I saw those 25 big follies. Then I started to feel sick a day later. I went in on Monday for my second u/s and they said I was just about ready, most of the follicles were between 14-16. I was not to take any more Gonal and just coast for one day. I went in yesterday and they looked amazing. She counted 21 that were between 15-19. (Most were at 17-19) She told me there were more that were in there that she couldn't measure easily and guessed I had way more than 21 that were ready to go. I wasn't feeling great, but figured the follicles were sucking out all my energy. On Monday the nurse who does the u/s did show me the pockets of fluid that were pooling in my abdomen around my uterus and ovaries. She talked about how I can get dehydrated and feel sick so I need to drink water like a crazy person. It wasn't until Tuesday that I realized it was kind of serious. My IVF nurse came in and started saying things like, no transfer, and hospital stay. I was confused. Then she told me my E2 was really high and they needed me not to go into major OHSS.



E2 Levels:

Baseline - 39
After 7 day stims - 3067
After 9 days stims - 5826
9 days then coast - 6615



She said the absolute highest they like to see the E2 is 4000. Whoops. I guess I passed that a bit. So I triggered last night only with Ovadril and did not use the HCG Novarel. She said the Ovadril can actually help with OHSS while the HCG will only make it more severe.



I am trying not to freak out. I know this is out of my hands and there is nothing I can do. I am set to go in at 8 am tomorrow for my retrieval and hopefully have my transfer on Saturday or Sunday.



There are some good signs that it will not progress into a major problem...

1. I have not gained a single pound
2. I am not vomiting, I am nauseated but can keep everything down
3. My waist is measuring what it did before this cycle



So for now I will be drinking much more than the recommended 1/2 gallon of water. I have also noticed that taking a nap helps. Luckily since my clinic is over an hour away from home, I have not had to go to work. I have been staying with my parents and they are so wonderful and are making every accommodation to help me. The down side is DH has still had to work and hasn't been here with me. He dropped me off Sunday night for my Monday appt and will return tonight for the retrieval tomorrow. I miss him like mad! I don't do well away from him. I also will not be looking around Google for info. I don't need negative thoughts running around in my brain.

It will all be ok. I just need to remain calm and trust in the Lord.