Not our month

So no miracle baby this month. It was a lot harder this time when AF came than it was last month. Not because I thought I had a better chance of it working this month, I think it was just one of those months. I think we all have those kinds of cycles. The ones where we literally feel like we can't stand to go one more day without having a baby or the possibility of one. I was so consumed with grief I cried quite a bit the last few days. I am just over not being able to do what so many women can. I am over my husband not being able to do what so many men can. I am done with all this IF crap! I just want off this ride!! Unfortunately, I am not the one who gets to choose when this roller coaster ends or even how it will end. So I am taking it one day at a time and counting my many blessings... even if the one blessing I desire most is being withheld.